Go....

Hey ya'll!!! I know every time I blog, I talk about the time since my last post and how I'll post more often. Well I'm not doing that today because- ain't no need lol!

So... it's been awhile...But the story continues. We met with our urologist- found the problem and found a solution!!!!

The solution is IVF!

In Vitro Fertilization.....but not traditional IVF but IVF with ICSI. I told ya'll about ICSI a few blogs ago. Basically fertility specialist will retrieve my eggs and give them to the embryologist. The embryologist will inject my husbands sperm into my egg and watch them grow for 5 days. After 5 days of growth, the best embryos will be frozen.

I will not share Husbae's experience because that is his story to tell. But I will talk about it from my prospective.

When our Urologist told us the issue and told us the solution- it was bittersweet to be honest. We were happy we were on a different road to Baby Pettus and this road seemed a little promising. But, the cost was looking like about $25,000 including IVF medications without the assistance of insurance. This is OUT OF POCKET cost. No payment plan. No GoFundMe. No nothing! lol. I'm making light of it, because God always provides- but the truth of the matter is- it really sucks.

Side note about North Carolina: They will give free abortions but won't help families that struggle with infertility. They won't even put laws in place to make insurance companies cover a portion of the cost. So sad.

Anyway, from the start- it seemed a little overwhelming....the process. Taking antibiotics, estrogen pills, estrogens patches, stimulating medications, trigger shot, transfer medications, vaginal ultrasounds every 3 days. Then you have side effects: bloating, nausea, headaches, fatigue, etc. Chile! The feeling of being overwhelmed came from what I was told and what I researched. This was before the process even started. I had no idea what my experience would actually be.

The fertility clinic tells you to call on the first day of your period. So I called. They scheduled an appointment for bloodwork, a vaginal ultrasound, an Endometrial Biopsy.

Ya'll ready for a quick science lesson? lol

I was already nervous- because I had to have a sonohysterogram before this. That is when the OB opens your uterus with a balloon and fills it with a saline solution. Once the saline solution is in-the balloon is removed. This is an ultrasound that gives a better view of the inside of your uterus. Needless to say, It was very uncomfortable. They tell you to take some ibuprofen before you come, but......I forgot. My OB found a mass and she wanted to make sure it wouldn't cause a miscarriage. Well once she went in- she saw nothing (Thank God).

I went in for my initial appointment. The bloodwork was fine- I've been poked and prodded so many times, it doesn't even effect me anymore. The vaginal ultrasound was fine, been there, done that. But that biopsy....

whew Jesus.

Science lesson: just like any biopsy- its when they collect a small sample to be tested. That sample came from my endometrial wall- which is the lining of my uterus. She scraped it. And I could feel it :(.

She warned me that it would hurt. But I didn't know it would hurt so bad. I took the ibuprofen as they suggested- but I really don't know if it helped. My husband had to leave the room to get his bloodwork done, so he wasn't there. Ya'll know- I literally feel like I can't do anything without him lol. It was hard. But I made it through it. Everything came back clear and we were ready to rock and roll.

So anyway, they started me on a cycle of antibiotics and estrogen patches. The patch needed to be changed every 3 days.

IVF began.....never thought I would end up there. But there I was- Killing it! lol

One thing I've learned in this process is: God can do what he wants to do when he wants to do it. The way my body responds is left up to God. He can make it happen or not. And my job is to trust him and believe we are following His will for getting our baby to the earth. Before I started- I asked God to give us at least 10 viable embryos to transfer and left the process in His hand.

Sometimes God puts us in situations to build our trust in Him. It's like the bible story where God told Abram- "Go to a place, that I will show you". Literally he was walking, following God. He had no idea where he was going. Don't you know that requires complete trust? In most situations, like I've told you all before- I sometimes think I know best and can make my own ways. But God was like, ok "Abram-iana" lol.....GO! God has put me in a position to do two things: Trust and be obedient. Sometimes obedience looks like, just trusting His plan- Go. Are you willing to trust his plan and just GO?

I encourage you to listen carefully to his instructions and JUST GO! You're gonna reap the benefits sis. Trust Him.

Continue to read the blog and walk through life and infertility with me! I am so glad to share this space with you! Know that your words form your life. Speak out loud what God says about you. Walking into the place Holy Spirit has told you to go to so that we can fulfill his word and you can reap the benefits of obedience.

I WILL GO

"The LORD had said to Abram, “Leave your native country, your relatives, and your father’s family, and go to the land that I will show you." Genesis 12:1

I love you girl,

Mell P.